Relationship Rupture and Repair Pattern of Destruction and Restoration BPD NPD
Dr. Daniel Fox Dr. Daniel Fox
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 Published On Premiered Feb 6, 2021

Order The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook by Dr. Fox: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1

Dr. Fox offers consultation sessions to help you learn more about your BPD:
https://www.drdfox.com/consultation

Dr. Fox’s latest (research based book): Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders: A New Conceptualization of Development, Reinforcement, Expression, and Treatment: https://www.amazon.com/Antisocial-Nar...

In this video we’re going to discuss two common and related issues called rupture & repair and secondary thinking. Each of these issues makes relationships more difficult and increase the probability of acting out behaviors toward yourself or someone else. As always, after we explore these issues I’ll give you some tips on how to manage them and do it differently. Change is possible when knowledge is empowerment.

Rupture and repair (R&R) is when you do or say something that ruptures the relationship and then you engage in behavior to repair it. This occurs in not just romantic relationships, but with family and at work, in public, etc.

This activating instance causes you inner turmoil, like anxiety or agitation that drives second guessing, which is the shoulda, woulda, coulda stuff. As this builds inside of you this activation drives you to engage in maladaptive patterns that cause the rupture in an attempt to manage the situation inside and outside yourself. This can include cursing someone out, throwing things, violence, acting out, etc.

After the rupture, guilt, shame, doubt, self-contempt usually follows. This is where you put yourself on a self-punishment plan that may include self-harm, isolation, self-ridicule, etc.

Once you’ve made it through the self-punishment phase, you engage in the repair phase. This is where you say or do something to restore the relationship. In many instances, you may feel validated by the ability to repair the relationship because it means it’s not all falling apart and your S.O. is not going to leave you. However, this unhealthy test tends to erode your relationship and increase the probability of the relationship actually failing.

Daniel J. Fox, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist in Texas, international speaker, and a multi-award winning author. He has been specializing in the treatment and assessment of individuals with personality disorders for over 15 years in the state and federal prison system, universities, and in private practice. His specialty areas include personality disorders, ethics, burnout prevention, and emotional intelligence.

He has published several articles in these areas and is the author of:

Antisocial, Narcissistic, and Borderline Personality Disorders: A New Conceptualization of Development, Reinforcement, Expression, and Treatment. Available at: https://www.drdfox.com/books

The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook: An Integrative Program to Understand and Manage Your BPD. Available at: https://goo.gl/LQEgy1

Antisocial, Borderline, Narcissistic and Histrionic Workbook: Treatment Strategies for Cluster B Personality Disorders (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Gold Award Winner): https://goo.gl/BLRkFy

Narcissistic Personality Disorder Toolbox: 55 Practical Treatment Techniques for Clients, Their Parents & Their Children (IPBA Benjamin Franklin Silver Award Winner):: https://goo.gl/sZYhym

The Clinician’s Guide to Diagnosis and Treatment of Personality Disorders: https://goo.gl/ZAVe9v

Dr. Fox has given numerous workshops and seminars on ethics and personality disorders, personality disorders and crime, treatment solutions for treating clients along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum, emotional intelligence, managing mental health within the prison system, and others. Dr. Fox maintains a website of various treatment interventions focused on working with and attenuating the symptomatology related to individuals along the antisocial, borderline, narcissistic, and histrionic personality spectrum (www.drdfox.com).

YouTube:    / drdanielfox  
Dr. Fox’s website: http://www.drdfox.com/
Facebook:   / appliedpsychservices  
Twitter:   / drdanieljfox1  
LinkedIn:   / drdfox  
Instagram:   / drdfox  
Amazon Author’s Page: amazon.com/author/drfox

Videos edited by Emil Christopher: [email protected]

Thank you for your attention and I hope you enjoy my videos and find them helpful and subscribe. I always welcome topic suggestions and comments.

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